Repent The End Is NearIt doesn’t seem that very many folks have gotten the memo about the “Maya Apocalypse 2012” being fraudulent. At least one doomsaying lunatic is spewing this steaming load of stupidity and lies. AOL ran this publicity piece for a would-be Internet prophet of destruction named Michael Luckman (WebCite cached article):

Going into a new profession six months before you think the world’s going to end may not be the smartest of career moves, but don’t tell that to Michael Luckman.

The New York-based writer of UFO books is committed to becoming what some might call “the D.J. of Doomsday” with a new radio show, “Radio Doomsday.”

The show, which could be promoted as “all doomsday, all the time,” airs every Thursday at midnight. It premiered a few weeks ago and Luckman predicts interest will pick up over the next six months. That’s because some believe that the world will end on Dec. 21, the last day of the Mayan calendar.

That “‘the’ Mayan calendar” doesn’t actually have a “last day” is something I’ve been blogging for a couple years now. That doesn’t appear to matter much to Luckman, who’s deluded himself into thinking he’s onto something:

Signs abound that the Apocalypse is upon us, according to Luckman. Events like the devastating Japanese tsunami, declines in the populations of certain honeybee species and last year’s Hurricane Irene dovetail nicely with increased doomsday fears.

Luckman’s trouble is, events like animal rainfalls, the Japanese earthquake/tsunami, the onset of colony collapse disorder, and hurricanes happen all the time — unfortunately — and there actually has been no statistically-meaningful increase in them. He just thinks there has been … and that’s all he cares about.

(Such insular, subjective thinking is the height of arrogance and self-centeredness, not to mention being a hallmark of a crank, but I digress.)

Luckman displays his lack of logic in this manner:

“I’m not coming from a biblical perspective,” Luckman told The Huffington Post. “But there are many parallels between what is happening now and what is in the Old Testament and New Testament. I think increased sightings of UFOs are also directly related to the end times.”

Hopefully you see the contradiction here: He says he’s not being “Biblical,” yet he appeals to the Bible nonetheless. Hmm.

Although NASA scientists and other educators have repeatedly said the end of the Mayan calendar just reflects the close of a cycle, Luckman insists they’re missing the big picture.

“I’ve seen the NASA statements,” said Luckman, who is also director of the New York Center for Extraterrestrial Research and founder of the Cosmic Majority, which aims to reach out to alien intelligence. “Whatever they come up with, I can counter. We have birds falling from the skies, depletion of the honeybee population and trees that are 4,000 years old dying.”

I’m sure that, within the staggeringly empty vault of Luckman’s mind, he genuinely thinks he can “counter” anything that real, live, working astronomers and Mesoamerican anthropologists might say (cached) … but that hardly means he’s correct or that he truly knows what he’s talking about. Luckman’s lies mount as the article goes on:

“The simple truth is that many of us are unlikely to survive the coming Earth changes due to solar super storms, Planet X and a possible pole shift in 2012 and beyond,” he told The Huffington Post. “Mayan elders have broken their silence and confided to me the truth about the Mayan calendar and the dangerous times we are living in. A large portion of Earth’s population may perish during the transition into an enlightened new age.”

Not one of these things is true … in fact, a real live Mayan elder has gone on record as saying there will be no apocalypse. My guess is, Luckman doesn’t know a word of Mayan, has never met a live Mayan, has no fucking clue what the Maya actually said or thought, and hasn’t the slightest knowledge of astronomy.

Unfortunately, Mr Luckman, expertise does not come from merely talking and acting as though one’s an “expert” in something. Rather, it comes from rolling up one’s sleeves, getting an education in a field, and actually working in it for a while.

Here’s my open challenge to Mr Luckman and other doomsayers of his ilk: Will you state in advance — right here, right now, without reservation — that, once December 22, 2012 arrives and there’s been no “Maya apocalypse,” you promise to issue an unqualified apology for having lied to people, and without delay or equivocation donate the proceeds of your doomsaying to charity? If you’re sincere about your beliefs and are correct about the world ending on December 21, 2012, you should have no qualms about making such a pledge. Do you have the courage to do it? If so, contact me and let me know. I’ll make arrangements to ensure your pledge is kept.

Photo credit: Robert Bejil Photography, via Flickr.

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