Red Sox logo (upside down to show how terrible they are)Once again, Dear Reader, I feel compelled to take a break from the usual topic of this blog to go over the hapless boys of Beantown.

Yes, I’m aware the Red Sox won the World Series last year. One would think that had been a redemptive effort, a collective team apology for the asinine debacle which was the inexcusable September 2011 collapse and the memorably incompetent 2012 season. Clearly, though, given the team’s effort to date — sporting as they do a 41-51 record as I type this — that World Series win was an anomaly. Since the 2010 season, the Red Sox have appeared in the playoffs only once … in 2013, when they won it all. Other than that, they haven’t done a whole lot.

With the All Star Game a few days away, it’s clear the Sox aren’t going to make the playoffs. Now that this is apparent, things are really starting to unravel. As perhaps the first manifestation of management giving up the season, catcher A.J. Pierzynski has been designated for assignment in favor of young prospect Christian Vasquez.

But that’s not all there is to this story. In truly classy fashion, the Sox chose to throw the guy under the bus as they shoved him out the door; in doing so they imply he was responsible for their dismal play.

But it’s not just about him. All right, it’s not news to anyone that Pierzynski is a malcontent and asshole. A couple years ago he was voted the most-hated player in the MLB — by his own colleagues! No one expected him to act like a choir boy. However, now that he’s gone, the Boston sports media are happily cranking out stories about how nasty the guy was. My question, now, is … if the guy was so intolerably awful, through spring training and half a season, why are we only just now hearing about it? Why weren’t the media reporting this shit while it was going on? Why were reporters dutifully toeing the Fenway line about how everything was just hunky-dory with the most-hated man in baseball? I’ve only been able to find one story about Pierzynski’s shortcomings, by John Tomase of the Herald, and that was in late May. But even then, the article made it seem Pierzynski was just clueless, not a “negative influence in the clubhouse.” Fans could have used this information weeks ago — but it wasn’t provided to them.

I’m guessing this October when the season’s over, we’ll be treated to another exposé providing a litany of the various goings-on that destroyed the team. As before, though, all of the information in this exposé will have been long known to the Boston sports media. They’ll have held it all back while the season was underway … and while fans are scratching their heads wondering how and why it could be this bad.

Of course, Pierzynski was hardly the only malcontent on the team. One of them remains, and there’s no evidence he’s going to be traded or DFA’d. That malcontent is David Ortiz, aka “the Big Papi.” At this point he qualifies for the title of “the biggest baby in baseball.” His nature as a malcontent has been well-known, at least for the 3 years since he stormed into a press conference being held by then-manager Terry Francona and spewed profanities at him over an RBI he thought he should have been granted. It’s not as though this was a one-time thing, though; he continues to pitch fits over scoring matters. He also whines and cries whenever someone implies he’d been juicing — which, the Mitchell report claims, he really did, at least before it was written in 2003. That too is not new for the Big Papi; he’s been sensitive to this talk for the last few years. Oh, and even those aren’t the limit of his crybaby antics: He’s griped about his contract and about the Red Sox schedule, too. Not to mention, a year ago he demolished a dugout phone over being thrown out of a game because he mouthed off at a home-plate umpire over what he thought was a bad call but which was actually correct.

Here’s a thought, Mr Ortiz: Maybe you should stop getting your knickers in knots over RBIs and PEDs and dollar signs, and instead, grow the hell up and start fucking hitting again. You make millions of dollars a year playing a game, fercryinoutloud! Try acting as though you’ve earned all that money, instead of spouting off like a petulant child all the time.

Oh, and the people in the Boston sports media should also start acting as though they’ve earned what they’re paid. Report on what’s happening with this team — while it’s happening, rather than weeks or months later. You know the people on the team, and you know what’s plaguing them. You know something’s rotten in Fenway, so report on it already. We can take it. If we’re going to be treated to another 2012 season, at least we should know why. Besides, revealing their juvenile antics to the world while there’s still nearly half a season left to play, might encourage the Red Sox to straighten out their acts and get them to play well again. It’s worth a shot, isn’t it?

The bottom line is that the team that went from last place in 2012 to first in 2013 has already gone to last again in 2014. Will they stay there? I’m guessing they will, unless something changes. Something really big.

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