Crying babyLots of gay-haters and ardent religionists in Europe — and in the rest of the world — have got their knickers tied in knots over a drag queen winning the Eurovision Song Contest for 2014. Apparently this sort of thing just isn’t allowed to happen … but now that it has, cataclysm has ensued. Supposedly. Among those who’ve thrown tantrums over it, was the Russian government, which forbade holding a parade in the winner’s honor (WebCite cached article).

Yeah, it was that important. I guess.

In light of titanic flooding in the Balkans (cached), the (UK) Guardian reports some Orthodox Church officials have decided the outcome of this year’s Eurovision contest had to have been the cause (cached):

Conchita Wurst is responsible for flooding that left over 50 people dead earlier this month, church leaders in the Balkans have claimed.

The Austrian drag artist, whose real name is Thomas Neuwirth, seized international attention after winning Eurovision 2014 with his hit Rise Like a Phoenix.

However, several church leaders have now claimed the recent devastating flooding across the Balkans, which was the worst in a century and left over 50 people dead, was “divine punishment” for Conchita’s victory.

“This [flood] is not a coincidence, but a warning,” Patriarch Amfilohije of Montenegro said, according to e.novine.com [cached]. “God sent the rains as a reminder that people should not join the wild side.”

Patriarch Irinej, the spiritual leader of Eastern Orthodox Serbs, reportedly said the floods were “divine punishment for their vices” and that “God is thus washing Serbia of its sins”.

This is a classic example of shoehorning, and is also an application of what I call disaster theology, and what Julie Mason of Sirius XM calls “disasterbating.”

Such reasoning is a hallmark of arrogant, sanctimonious religionists who think the entire universe revolves around them and their beliefs. It hasn’t occurred to these pompous assholes that a drag queen winning Eurovision has nothing to do with them, their deity, or their religion … because in their eyes, nothing that ever happens anywhere in the cosmos could possibly fail to have something to do with them and their faith.

I have to say, these guys are far too old to be acting like infants. It’s long past time they grew the fuck up, for the first time in their lives, and stopped sniveling and whining about things that, really, are none of their goddamn business.

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons.

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