Posts Tagged “cryptozoology”

Loch Ness Serpent Dragon, via PixabayThe folks over at Google have a remarkable sense of humor. One of the ways they express it is through their “Google Doodles,” or graphics/animations/minigames they show, just for one day, on their main home page.

Today’s Doodle is a rather amusing choice — given its circumstances. It involves the Loch Ness Monster … and more specifically, the so-called “Surgeon’s Photograph” which made Nessie the most famous nonexistent creature on the planet:

Google Doodle for 4/12/2015 — Loch Ness Monster

Google Doodle for 4/12/2015 — Loch Ness Monster

Google further adds to the amusement by allowing folks to use its “Street View” feature to roam Lake Ness itself to search for “Nessie.”

Here’s the “Surgeon’s Photo” itself, in case you don’t recall it:

'Surgeon's Photo' of Loch Ness Monster / by Robert Kenneth Wilson, published in Daily Mail (UK) on 4/21/1934 / via Buzzfeed (URL:

‘Surgeon’s Photo’ of Loch Ness Monster / by Robert Kenneth Wilson, published in Daily Mail (UK) on 4/21/1934 / via Buzzfeed

The most endearing part of all of this is that the photo this Doodle commemorates — which for many constitutes unassailable “proof” there’s a monster in the Scottish lake — is actually a hoax, as Time magazine explains (WebCite cached article). Yes, I’m sorry to break it to all of you who actually think it’s a real photo of an actual lake monster, but it truly is not. It is, instead, a small serpent’s head that had been attached to a toy submarine.

The cold fact is that every search that has ever been done for “Nessie” — and there have been a number of them, including some using technology that was state-of-the-art in their times, the most recent in 2008 — has utterly failed to find anything like the fabled lake monster. That’s right … there is absolutely no foundation to the legend of the Loch Ness Monster. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Zero. Bupkis. No amount of insisting it “must” be there, because it’s been reported to be there, can ever make this so.

Photo credit: Pixabay.

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Hoaxed photo of the Loch Ness monster from 21 April 1934.We’ve seen that Creationists will stop at nothing to indoctrinate school children with their irrational, non-factual, hyperreligious dogma. They’re ferociously angry at the idea that anyone might actually accept evolution (what they often call “Darwinism”*). That evolution is currently the only valid scientific explanation for the diversity of life on the planet, doesn’t matter to them. They’re still outraged that science has validated evolution. (“Science,” you see, in their minds is an insidious diabolical conspiracy designed to destroy them.)

An example of just how far these people will go in their sanctimonious effort to promote Creationism and discredit evolution, can be seen in this Scotsman report about a Louisiana outfit that claims the Loch Ness Monster refutes evolution (WebCite cached article):

Thousands of American school pupils are to be taught that the Loch Ness monster is real — in an attempt by religious teachers to disprove Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution.

Pupils attending privately-run Christian schools in the southern state of Louisiana will learn from textbooks next year, which claim Scotland’s most famous mythological beast is a living creature. …

One ACE [Accelerated Christian Education] textbook called Biology 1099, Accelerated Christian Education Inc reads: “Are dinosaurs alive today? Scientists are becoming more convinced of their existence.

“Have you heard of the Loch Ness Monster in Scotland? ‘Nessie’ for short has been recorded on sonar from a small submarine, described by eyewitnesses, and photographed by others. Nessie appears to be a plesiosaur.”

Another claim taught is that a Japanese whaling boat once caught a dinosaur.

These are lies, of course. The putative Loch Ness Monster has never been recorded by any imaging device, ever … not by sonar, and not even by photograph — for example, the famous “surgeon’s photo,” above, is a known hoax (cached). Over the last few decades, a number of expeditions have tried to locate and image “Nessie,” but all have failed to do so. If “Nessie” exists, then she’s done a remarkable job of hiding herself from all of these efforts. Maybe this is because she’s aware she’s being searched for and is purposely avoiding detection, specifically in order to deprive skeptics of evidence of her existence …!?

In short … one can’t possibly use “Nessie” as proof evolution isn’t true, because “Nessie” does not even exist!

It’s one thing for private Christianist schools to want to teach this nonsense to their children. They’re free to do so, even if what they’re teaching is wrong. The problem here, as The Scotsman explains, is that public funding is financing the education of some of the kids who’ll be indoctrinated this way:

Thousands of children are to receive publicly-funded vouchers enabling them to attend the [ACE] schools — which follow a strict fundamentalist curriculum.

So Louisiana taxpayers will be picking up the tab for some of this religious indoctrination. I’m sure Louisiana’s devoutly religionistic governor, Bobby Jindal, doesn’t view this a a problem, but those of us with brains know otherwise.

* Use of the term “Darwinism” as a label for evolution is a rather transparent — not to mention juvenile — attempt to discredit it. It implies that evolution is merely “the teachings of Darwin,” rather than a valid field of science. Calling a field of science by the name of the person who first brought it to light, is simply not done. We do not, for example, call relativity “Einsteinism,” nor do we call quantum mechanics “Planckism.” Nor is classical physics called “Newtonism.” Really, Creationists need to grow up already and put “Darwinism” to rest, ferfucksakes.

Hat tip: Skeptical Inquirer.

Photo credit: Wikipedia.

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