Posts Tagged “flu”

Magic wand / kalhh, via PixabayOne of the things many people don’t realize about fundagelical Christians is that they like to wave their Jesus around like a magical talisman. They view him as the ultimate tool … for any vexing task.

Take, for example, this winter’s particularly bad flu season (Archive.Is cached article). Yes, for fundagelicals, even the flu is no match for the magic of Jesus. All you need do — as Gloria Copeland (wife of megapastor Kenneth Copeland) says, according to Right Wing Watch — is drop Jesus’ name a few times, and poof! the flu magically goes away (cached):

You’d think that given past experience, Copeland’s Eagle Mountain International Church might have learned a lesson, but you’d be wrong, as yesterday a video was posted on the ministry’s Facebook page [cached] featuring Copeland’s wife, Gloria, telling people that there is no such thing as flu season and that they don’t need to get a flu shot because “Jesus himself gave us the flu shot.”

“Listen, partners, we don’t have a flu season,” Gloria Copeland said. “And don’t receive it when somebody threatens you with, ‘Everybody is getting the flu.’ We’ve already had our shot, He bore our sicknesses and carried our diseases. That’s what we stand on.”

Praying for those who may already have the flu, Copeland proclaimed, “Flu, I bind you off the people in the name of Jesus. Jesus himself gave us the flu shot, He redeemed us from the curse of flu.” Those who don’t have the flu, she promised, can protect themselves by simply declaring, “I’ll never have the flu.”

What’s ironic about this is that the very fundagelicals who’ll ward off the flu with mantras like, “Flu, I bind you off the people in the name of Jesus,” in the very next breath would condemn the performance of witchcraft or magic, as well as taking the name of the Lord in vain. What’s more, they’ll never admit this rather blatant hypocrisy … even though their own Jesus explicitly and unambiguously ordered them never to be hypocritical, ever, at any time or for any reason. They just don’t get that their own religion contradicts itself.

Not to mention, repeatedly blabbering Jesus’ name will never do anything to prevent or cure the flu. It just won’t.

One last note, for all readers: If you haven’t gotten your flu shot yet, go get one. Don’t buy into any of the bullshit you’ve heard to the contrary. Just do it, ferfucksakes. Now!

Photo credit: kalhh, via Pixabay.

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